When I started this blog a few months ago, I was excited. Actually, excited is an understatement. I was ecstatic, over the roof, almost delirious with joy. Blogging had been a lifelong dream, and I was finally doing it. Nothing could have hushed my buzz. Or so I thought.

Flash-forward to a few weeks later, and the fire was gone. Buried in a pile of anxiety, sadness, lost hope, and confusion. I couldn’t string two sentences together, let alone finish a blog. Where had the bliss gone? Why was my dream shattering right before my face?

Fear

Yes, you heard me. Fear had so quickly replaced my joy. I was afraid I wasn’t witty enough; my thoughts not interesting enough. With the fear came my willingness to settle for pretty much anything.

Hey, I’d like to read about dating.

Sure I’ll write about it.

Hey, how about orangutans?

Um, sure. Why not

Soon enough, my blog was not my home as I’d intended it to be. It was a toolbox. A clustered toolbox filled with articles on things I didn’t even care about. Stories that didn’t set my heart alight. I had lost my spark. And I didn’t know it. I just slowly drifted away until I was as empty as my blog.

When the truth finally caught up to me. I was sickened. By myself for letting fear ruin my dream. For not using my writing as an escape, an anchor, a guiding light. But I’m not one to dwell. So I unpublished every piece I’d ever written and set off on a path of rediscovery.

This, today, marks the rebirth of The Chie Space. My home. I can’t say that I’ll do better this time. But you can be sure I’ll try. Second time’s the charm, right? Or is that third? Haha.

Welcome to my blog. I hope you enjoy the ride. I know I will.

Image by JamesDeMers from Pixabay